The healing power of a home to call your own – Kerrie’s story
After a series of traumatic events, including serious illness, Kerrie was shocked to find herself homeless, living in fear, in her car. Eventually she found shelter, advocacy and homelessness support through The Salvation Army’s Still Waters service and says she is “eternally grateful” now for a secure home. This Homelessness Week 2023 (7-13 August) Kerrie shares her story to help fight the stigma around homelessness and support other older women who have found themselves in a situation of homelessness, often through circumstances beyond their control.
Over the past few years, Kerrie has met women in their late 50s and over 60s living in their cars under a local bridge – women who were homeless, simply through life circumstances often totally out of their control.
“Just like me,” Kerrie says.
“Without the care of The Salvation Army Still Waters (emergency and medium-term crisis accommodation service and case management), including the house they eventually helped me into, I don’t know where I would be now – most likely still living in my car. Sick and in pain. Alone.”
Kerrie knows now that she has value, and that there is still hope in life, but it has been a long journey to arrive at that understanding.
Long journey to finding hope
As the eldest of five children and the only girl, Kerrie virtually had to raise her four brothers and take care of her mother too. Her dad worked away a lot and her mum was often ill. Kerrie realises now that her mum also struggled with alcoholism.
There were times when Kerrie and her siblings lived in various children’s homes in their younger years. She declares, “At one stage, a family member came to help out, but instead of help, I suffered an increased workload, abuse and then threats not to tell anyone.”
She explains, “I didn’t have a normal teenage-hood either as I still had the responsibilities of the children. Some tough times! I loved school though, and I focused on that. I especially loved English and through it all, I managed to keep a sense of humour.”
Escaping family and domestic violence
Life did not get any easier after leaving home. Kerrie explains, “I would love to say things got better as I got older, but sadly not for a long time. I got a job on the railways and got married. [Over the years] my four children and I faced the physical and mental abusive [of family and domestic violence]. I thought it was normal to be treated like that.”
Over that time, Kerrie worked up to three jobs to support the children and always helped others, as she had learned to do growing up. She says, “After 25 years of physical and mental abuse, my son helped me move out, but the damage was done.”
Kerrie had no confidence left. No self-belief.
She couldn’t look anyone in the eyes.
After the divorce, Kerrie struggled. She says, “A lot of our family funds were hidden from me, and I wasn’t able to recoup much. I lost the house and struggled to make ends meet. With [one] teenager still in my care, I just worked a lot of the time, and we rented a few places in caravan parks.”
Sickness, struggle and homelessness
After all Kerrie’s children had grown up and she was working in aged care, she started to feel unwell and had several falls. After many tests, her doctor told her that medically, with several complex conditions, she couldn’t work anymore.
Kerrie explains, “With no job and having to attend many medical appointments, finding a place to live became a nightmare. I searched for something I could afford but I just couldn’t find anywhere to rent, so I started living in my car and kept looking for an affordable rental. This was so hard. I was trying to manage my health with advanced osteoarthritis in both knees, in my lower spine and blood cancer. I was in a lot of pain.”
She would be asleep in her car and there would be knocks on her window. Sometimes it was the police moving her on. Other times she didn’t know who it was. She says, “It was so scary.
“At the time I felt so alone, but soon learned how many older women were facing the same homelessness situation. Women my age and older living under bridges and in cars, through no fault of our own. We need to do something [about it] quickly.”
Salvation Army Still Waters gives hope
Kerrie says, “I have always been an avid reader – it’s kept me going throughout my life – I just disappear into the book and forget about everything else.
“One day I went to an op’ shop to buy a light so I could keep reading in my car. I saw a poster in a nearby window advertising housing help and I talked to a lady, and she suggested I contact the Salvos. I accidently went into the Salvos church a few times and on the last time was greeted by a lovely woman named Wendy, a case worker, who took me into Still Waters [nearby]. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.
“I’d been living in the car, I was sick, and not in the best frame of mind.”
Kerrie says that life soon began to change.
“Just being at Still Waters gave me peace. Within a couple of weeks, one of the independent units at Still Waters became available, with its own kitchen and ensuite. I was feeling really good.”
Kerrie started to cook, garden and “feel alive”.
“With Wendy as my case worker, I was there for eight months. She liaised with Centrelink and disability services for me, checked on me and gave me new pillows and other lovely things. We had welfare checks twice a day. I liked this, because if feeling down, I could speak up,” Kerrie says.
If you think you are at risk of homelessness, contact the Salvos to end your homelessness story before it begins.
Wendy and the team eventually found Kerrie a newly built place to move into.
Kerrie says, “Today I am happy and in a better frame of mind, although I push my health a bit, but I’m okay with that. I have a nice little garden and keep busy. I read a lot – I have books everywhere.
“Over my eight-month stay at Still Waters, I felt supported and cared about. I learnt to value myself, something I have never done before. All the ladies there were nice, and we supported each other in different ways because well, I guess, we were in the same situation.
“I continue now to cook for myself, something I had stopped doing before Still Waters. I put on my makeup and go out, something else I had stopped doing. I have a life. I used to think I was too old for anything, but I don’t think that now.”
Homelessness among older women
Kerrie feels there is still a stigma and shame for homeless older people, particularly women.
She felt so much shame.
She says, “The most significant change in my thinking is to appreciate life and to start realising that I have always been a good person. My case worker and I had heaps of chats around loving myself and focusing on myself and my health. I have always struggled to put myself first.
“I now have a beautiful new home and for that I will be eternally grateful. I feel really thankful for Salvos donors and volunteers who make a difference in people’s lives. I have learned that no matter how far down you get, the Salvos are there to put their hand out and help you,” she says.
“I really do thank God for the Salvos.”